Back when I was in full bomb eating disorder (just before I literally ate …

Back when I was in a full-blown eating disorder (just before I literally ate anything but whipped cream all day) I might have looked healthy.
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I was slim and ate vegetables and protein. To the outside world it seemed fine to me.
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But what no one knew was what I told myself. "You are weak, you are not good enough, there is nothing special about you so you have to be skinny to stand out, you are fat, you did not make that piece of cake, do not eat it, limit, binge, I can't believe you ate it, "and the list goes on.
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These things consumed me every single day ….. which didn't allow much life. It became the norm that I hardly realized what was holding me to it.
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One of the first things I did to change the conversation in my head was to become aware of it … and it's also the first thing I teach my clients to do. With awareness we can cultivate change.
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But how do we do that? I can't tell you what's the right way for you because I don't know you, but here's an exercise that worked for me and still does to this day … I got it from a book I can't remember right now
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Whenever you have a negative thought, whatever it may be …. tell yourself "oh, it's that thought again." Then watch the stream and the permissions flow down. Then put one thought on one of the leaves and watch it float away down the creek until it is gone.
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What we tell ourselves must be our reality … try it for yourself and see how it feels. But practice because it may seem unnatural to begin with!

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